Dr Sigmund Filth Hullo unt velcome ya!

Allow me to introduce myzelf, I am Dr Sigmund Filth, ze esteemed sexologist from Swiss. It is my proposal zat ze vorld's problem are a direct rezult of trapped sexual energy unt I haf dedicated my life verk to helpink people learn to release zis from eine jung age. Is most impawdant no? For fife year, I run a renoun sex klinik in London's cuttink-edge Archvay just abof ze Stand-Tan Deliver, you know, till ve haf little problem vit mein old china platez at Interpol, ya? But in zis short times ve haf amazink success vit ze teenagers sittink alone vid Playstation unt lackink ambitions unt listenink to gloomy or aggressif moozik. First ve administer special tonics, vich relax ze body, unt zen ve undress for prolong cuddlink sessions. I propose zat digital-age zuper-orgies, overseen by myzelf, vill remove ze need for vestern materialism unt all zes multinational shvines. In extreme case, for example ze Mogwai fan, it take a veek of tonics unt cuddlink unt flushink vit mein special salty slush puppy solution, but ve always return zem to ze streets vistlink eine happier toon.

Ah so. I am currently seeking fundink for Lolitapop Subtext: Contemporary Teenage Sexuality Under Ze Microscopes.

Examine ze recent toon Overload by sree jung vomen hailink from London unt callink zemselves za Sugababes.

Strange fear I ain't felt for years The boy's coming and I'm close to tears I can't let go of you now Zis ist disarming in itís honesty, nein? Ze yearnink for phallus ist causink hysteriks unt neurosis.

Imagination's playing round for free In my world I take him out for tea Oh my God, can't say no Ze non-sexual innocence of ze "tea" image unt ze use of ze sacred ist eine juxtapose for ze profanity to come in ze next werse.

Skipping school, go walk for air I just had to get out of bed I'm on overload in my head Extended masturbation ist clearly causink abherrant behavior in zees ladies. Zay lay about casually teasink zer erogenous zones till zay feel suffocation und zer academic verk ist sufferink.

Train comes I don't know its destination It's a one-way ticket to a madman's situation Burgeonink teenage sexuality ist on full steam unt dangerously irresistable. Ze use off ze verd "madman" suggests eine visit to ze klinik ist off vital immediacy.

Life is a dream, time does come true And in my sleep I think of you Ze sexual yearning ist takink control off ze space unt time continuum.

Feather bed by myself. Basically probability Says that fate's come side with me It's been so long on my shelf Furzer masturbation. Ze feather bed may indicate fear of beink eine chicken. Or perhaps zey use feathers to gently excite zemselves until zey explode. But zis fear ist counterd vith eine greater fear off beink "on the shelf" - und compounded by ze cold math of "probability"

The tension is incredible, boy I'm in charge You know how I feel for you, Will you stop, or will you just keep going Please don't say no, no, no, no Eine classic usage of ze middle-eightz as ze "orgasm" of eine song, vith ze gif-away references to ze vaginal tightenink. Yet so, just as ze narrator has eine feelink of control, zis falls into confusion und zen fear off ze jism if ze phallus "keeps going". Howeffer, ze subject transcends fears of ze bun in ze oven or fullblown clap.

Diagnosis - Desire for phallus ist profoundly troublink zes jung ladies. Howeffer all ist not lost if ve verk very fast. I proscribe zey take four Mogwai fans per days, after ze meals.